In the whirlwind of wedding planning, sometimes the most beautiful stories emerge not from rigid perfection, but from embracing the journey. My initial thought was to title this post “The Ceremony,” but that felt far too limiting, evoking a sense of solemnity I wished to transcend, and honestly, a bit too reminiscent of tales like “The Handmaid’s Tale.” More importantly, I realized the true magic of our wedding day began long before the vows were exchanged. There was a tapestry of moments, emotions, and personal touches leading up to it that deserved their own spotlight. So, settle in, because today, we’re diving deep into the morning of our San Francisco wedding, a day that was perfectly imperfect in every glorious way, culminating in an intimate ceremony filled with laughter, tears, and unforgettable memories.
Last week, I shared details about our delightful Welcome Dinner, a relaxed evening that allowed us to greet all our guests before the main event. It was such a special start, easing any pre-wedding jitters. After a lovely evening, C and I, along with our beloved dog, Bo, headed back to our apartment and, surprisingly, managed to get a solid night’s sleep. The next morning dawned with C tackling a few last-minute errands while I made my way to the Ritz Carlton Residences, where my family was staying, to begin the transformation.
One of the early decisions C and I made for our San Francisco wedding was to forgo a traditional wedding party. While I deeply cherish my friends and family and would be honored to stand by any of them, the thought of coordinating multiple schedules and preferences felt genuinely overwhelming. Our primary goal was to keep things as simple and stress-free as possible, focusing on the essence of our commitment. Similarly, we opted out of hiring a videographer. Knowing we’d have two incredibly talented photographers capturing every moment was more than enough for us. The idea of being constantly followed by a camera made me a little anxious, and I can confidently say, looking back, that we have zero regrets about either of these choices. Our phenomenal photographer, Sierra, absolutely crushed it, immortalizing our day with stunning clarity and emotion.
Even without a formal wedding party, I still wanted my closest friends and family to share in the excitement of getting ready. It became a wonderfully relaxed gathering, a blend of hair and makeup appointments and genuine camaraderie. Picture this: a room filled with delicious food, endless mimosas, and the vibrant chatter of loved ones. These moments of shared joy and anticipation are truly some of my most treasured memories from our wedding day. A special shout-out goes to Erica, who went above and beyond to pick up fresh bread from The Mill that morning – she just *gets* me and my appreciation for the simple, delightful things.
Our incredible hair and makeup artists, Sarah and Nikol, arrived shortly after, bringing with them a wonderful sense of calm and a fantastic go-with-the-flow attitude – essential qualities on a wedding morning! Their talent was evident in every detail, making me feel absolutely radiant. Following their artistry, my wonderful mom stepped in to help me into my dress. The Blush by Hayley Paige “Saylor” gown, with its delicate details, felt absolutely perfect for our intimate San Francisco celebration. We captured a few quick pictures before embarking on the highly anticipated “first look.”
The morning was peppered with delightful highlights: my curious five-year-old niece observing Nikol’s every makeup stroke with intense fascination; the collective effort (and humor!) of my mom and friends attempting to open a magnum of champagne; and the absolute dream-come-true moment of being hand-fed fresh cherries from Bi-Rite. These seemingly small moments are etched in my memory, symbolizing the warmth and love that enveloped us.
One of the most cherished moments was presenting my Mom and Mother-In-Law with a truly special gift. Knowing their shared love for tea, I collaborated with Yerba Buena Tea Company to create a custom tea blend. We carefully selected their favorite flavors and incorporated relaxation herbs, crafting what we affectionately named the “Maven” tea blend – a nod to the incredible wisdom and guidance I’ve received from both of them. I ordered a few extra for myself, and to this day, a cup of Maven tea is a comforting start to my every morning.
And with that, the stage was set for our first look, a moment I had been eagerly anticipating!
Meanwhile, back at our apartment, C was undergoing his own version of “getting ready” with his friends and family. I put “getting ready” in quotes because, if I’m being honest, I suspect it involved more whiskey shots and YouTube tutorials on tying a bowtie than anything else! C, having accumulated numerous suits that rarely see the light of day in the casual Bay Area (the land of polos and hoodies), chose to wear one of his existing custom suits rather than purchasing a new one. It was important to both of us that his outfit felt authentically “him,” so he styled it in a way that truly reflected his personality. Naturally, this included a dapper bowtie – the man adores a bowtie – and a crisp pocket square. But the most poignant detail was the pin he wore in memory of his late father. His mother and sister also wore pins, each symbolizing a significant milestone from his father’s impressive 35+ years working at the VA. It was a beautiful and heartfelt way to honor his memory and ensure his presence was felt throughout our special day, a truly unique touch for our San Francisco wedding.
Given that both our preparations took place within the beautiful Presidio, we decided it was the perfect backdrop for our first look photos. We chose Lover’s Lane, a picturesque pathway steeped in history. Its name originates from the 18th century, when soldiers would walk this very path towards the sunnier mission to visit their loved ones. The sentiment felt incredibly fitting for our own journey towards forever.
By this point, my excitement to see C (and Bodhi, our beloved pup!) was almost unbearable. Stepping onto Lover’s Lane, I felt a wave of relief knowing that from that moment forward, we would spend the entire day together. The first look was truly magical. We spent about 20 minutes capturing beautiful photographs – just the two of us, and then with Bodhi, who, of course, stole some of the show. I am absolutely obsessed with how these photos turned out; they perfectly encapsulate the joy, anticipation, and pure love of that moment, framed by the natural beauty of the Presidio.
From Lover’s Lane, we made our way to our beautiful venue, The Presidio Golf Course Clubhouse, ready for family photos and the final preparations before our much-anticipated ceremony. I won’t sugarcoat this part: I was absolutely freezing! While we were quite lucky with San Francisco weather, enjoying temperatures in the low 60s, the winds sweeping through the Presidio were relentless. Standing outside in my dress was chilling me to the bone. I ended up huddling in a room, shivering and nursing a warm cup of tea, just trying to thaw out. Little did I know, these powerful winds would play a rather significant and memorable role in our ceremony itself – but more on that delightful chaos later!
As many of you know, I am Jewish, and C does not have a religious background. While C didn’t grow up with specific religious beliefs, it was incredibly important to us that we honor and acknowledge my Jewish heritage and traditions within our wedding ceremony. We chose to be married by a wonderful rabbi, with whom we collaborated closely to weave together elements that felt deeply personal to us as a couple, alongside meaningful aspects of a traditional Jewish ceremony. This blend of traditions truly made our Presidio wedding unique and reflective of our shared values.
A beautiful and integral part of a Jewish wedding ceremony is the signing of the Ketubah, which is essentially a Jewish marriage license. Traditionally, the groom has a “Tisch,” a lively gathering with male friends and family filled with drinking, singing, and boisterous celebration, while the bride has a “Bedeken,” an opportunity for the important women in her life to greet her and offer words of wisdom and love. C had his own relaxed, informal “Tisch” back at our apartment, as I mentioned, but we adapted the Bedeken concept for our Ketubah signing. We wanted to create a meaningful moment, acknowledging a small, intimate group of individuals who have played incredibly vital roles in our lives and in nurturing our relationship. During the Ketubah signing, two witnesses are chosen, individuals you wish to have in your lives for the entirety of your marriage, who will help you uphold the vows within the Ketubah. For me, that person was my dear friend Lee, and for C, it was his childhood friend, Jake. This pre-ceremony ritual was a deeply moving way to honor our roots and the people who support us.
Following the emotional Ketubah signing, we shared a very small and private veiling of the bride, a moment of quiet reflection before the excitement of the main event. And then, it was time. Time for our civil ceremony, a moment filled with anticipation and, as it turned out, a healthy dose of delightful unpredictability.
This is where things truly got memorable, marking our unique journey to becoming husband and wife amidst the stunning backdrop of the Presidio Golf Course Clubhouse.
Before our wedding day, everyone had offered the familiar advice: “Things will go wrong, don’t sweat the small stuff, these minor disasters make for great stories later.” They were absolutely, unequivocally right! Our ceremony was the epitome of perfectly imperfect. It was a beautiful, slightly chaotic mess, much like life, and much like us. But that’s precisely what made it so memorable and authentic.
First and foremost, the winds were absolutely insane. I swear I was constantly pulling hair out of my mouth! Adding to the delightful disarray, I managed to trip going down the aisle not once, but twice (thankfully, nothing major, but a definite moment of comic relief, and a quick save from my dad!). Standing up there, I was still so incredibly cold from the pre-ceremony chill that I had C take off his jacket, which I then proceeded to wear for the remainder of the ceremony – a sartorial choice that was both practical and endearingly ‘us’. Our beautiful Ketubah, meant to symbolize our commitment, decided to take flight, momentarily soaring in the breeze. And, in a grand finale of wind-induced drama, my veil theatrically flew off my head right at the end of the ceremony. It was a series of unplanned events that we now recount with endless laughter.
BUT, despite all the hilarious mishaps and the natural elements playing their own part, it was also so, *so* profoundly beautiful.
I cherished standing under the chuppah, lovingly crafted by C and his uncle, and adorned with the Tallits (Jewish prayer shawls) from the strong women in my family, symbolizing protection and continuity. Drinking wine from the kiddush cup I received at birth was a deeply personal touch, connecting me to my heritage. The sight of Bodhi, our furry family member, along with my sweet niece and nephew, walking down the aisle filled my heart with immeasurable joy. The carefully selected music set the perfect tone, and standing on a rug brought back from C’s parents’ travels added another layer of personal history to our sacred space. Above all, I loved the vows we wrote together, reflecting our shared journey, and the heartfelt vows we wrote separately, expressing our individual promises. The entire ceremony was so utterly *us*. It wasn’t polished or according to a textbook plan, but it was a raw, deep, and honest reflection of who we are as individuals and as a couple – our ability to roll with the punches, find humor in chaos, and embrace the genuine beauty of life’s imperfections. This truly made our San Francisco Presidio wedding one-of-a-kind.
And for the record, I was absolutely convinced I wouldn’t cry. I was spectacularly wrong. The second I began to speak my vows, the floodgates opened, a testament to the overwhelming emotion and love I felt in that moment.
After the ceremony, C and I stole a few precious minutes alone, allowing the profound weight and joy of the moment to truly sink in. We then took a few more photographs before embarking on the surprisingly challenging task of figuring out my dress bustle, a comical half-hour endeavor. True to form, C was the only one who could decipher its intricate workings. Thank goodness I married him, not just for his love, but for his practical problem-solving skills!
I think it’s fair to say I could ramble on endlessly about every detail, but for now, I’ll save the delightful reception and the farewell brunch for next week’s post. I’m also planning a dedicated post to all the DIY details, as we undertook a significant amount of the wedding planning ourselves without a professional planner – perfect for anyone considering a personalized San Francisco wedding. I truly hope you’re enjoying reliving these moments with me. It’s been such a joy to share our journey. And if wedding stories aren’t your usual cup of tea, don’t worry – I’ll be back to our regular THM content next Monday, so stay tuned!
Wedding Vendors & Details:
Photography: Sierra Ashleigh Photography (Digital + Film)
Invitations: Minted
Wedding Dress: Blush by Hayley Paige
Bride’s Shoes: Raye Laurel Heel (Unfortunately, now sold out!)
Venue & Catering: Presidio Golf Course Clubhouse
Flowers: DIY – A detailed post on our wedding flower arrangements is coming soon!
Hair Stylist: Sarah Jordan from Harper Paige Salon
Makeup Artist: Nikol Elaine
DJ: Fox Sounds
Ceremony Music Selections: “This Feeling” by Alabama Shakes (Groom’s Processional), “River” by Leon Bridges (Bride’s Processional), “Precious Love” by James Morrison (Recessional)